Now that it's over can I say it? I hate Halloween.
I don't like dressing up, I don't like scary shit, and I don't like throwing massive amounts of money at either. It's one thing to help your kids dress up and go trick-or-treating, but we don't get the kids for Halloween, and that leaves me with very few options. This holiday has become one of three things for people my age who don't have kids to take out: 1) A holiday for sex; 2) A holiday for drinking; 3) A holiday for both. I don't really feel like dressing like a ho, getting smashed, watching a bunch of gory movies...none of that.
If you are my mother-in-law, you might have the...shall we say, MISTAKEN, idea that Halloween is some sort of family holiday (because we all end up as skeletons in the ground together? We all haunt as a family? What? I don't get it). None of these things interest me in the slightest. I just want to skip this dumbass holiday and get right to the good ones, the one's that are ACTUALLY family holidays, and the one's that taste good.
I don't really care for any gummie eyeballs. I need pumpkin pie, dammit, and I need it now.
